You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
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