Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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