whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
