I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
