There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
