You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
