i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
North Korea, Best Korea!
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Randomize
