what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
grandma shit on top of the toilet
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
