Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
