The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Randomize
