My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
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