This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize