So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
This is my gift to your gina
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize