I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Such a big mess for such a small penis
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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