I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
