addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
