Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
