he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
