btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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