Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
