puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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