he wants to bone in the snuggie
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
