Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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