What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Non-Jews are for practice
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Randomize
