Jerry, you need to find god
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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