This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
