So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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