I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
