Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
