he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
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