Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
