Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
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