I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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