i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
