Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
