Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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