Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
