I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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