You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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