Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
Buhtt sex?
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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