Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Randomize
