Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
