Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize