this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
