your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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