you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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