Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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