It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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