But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
