It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Everything about him screamed your future.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
