he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
