I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
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